Welcome to My First Poker Experience... Ever.

You know, while I'm all about work team events (whatever promotes that one big happy family feel... sigh.), I was inclined to back out of the poker party my team had planned for Wednesday night for a couple of reasons.

One, I have NOT been sleeping well lately (darn hotel beds) and am perpetually exhausted come, say, 3 PM. Two, well... I've never played poker before! And, MAN. These people sounded like they were LEGIT. Combine that with the fact that I scare of people (let alone competitive people) easily and... well, poker with coworkers sounded like a disaster waiting to happen.

Oh well. Twist my arm (it took all of about two seconds to convince me, let's be honest here).

I knew that the poker party was going to be my kind of thing pretty much as soon as I entered the room and helped myself to...


Weeeee!!! Holiday beer?!?! Any party that serves holiday beverages is MY KINDA PARTY!

After some food and chit-chatting, we got down to business... not like I really knew what "getting down to business" would mean in the poker sense but... well, whatever. All I know is that my coworkers started whipping out these like mini-SUITCASES filled with rows and rows of poker chips.


Let's have a double take, folks...


Aaaand that was precisely the point when the whole "addicted to gambling" side of me started to come out... even though the buy-in was only $10 (gotta love being the poker-playing rookie), the THOUGHT of how MUCH those chips could actually be WORTH was enough for my eyes to nearly pop out of its sockets. Obvi, this reaction was totally internalized because, well, I WAS with coworkers and, believe it or not, I CAN temper the chaos that IS me when in professional settings! I mean, professional lines have to be drawn at SOME point, right? (Riiiight... that's pretty much a moot point since you better BELIEVE I'll be sending this blog post to my coworkers... hello! Shameless self-advertising knows no bounds, people!).

Anyway, thankfully my team consists of pretty much the most patient people alive, who had no problems giving me a brief tutorial prior to actually beginning the game. Additionally, two people on my team provided me with different variations of poker cheat sheets (gotta love Smartphones) to help guide me in terms of what hands rank higher and whatnot.

So the game quickly commenced and, well, let's face it. I quickly got confused. Doesn't take much, really. But in my DEFENSE, there is a LOT to keep STRAIGHT in this GAME, people! I mean, Straight, Flush, Two Pair... how in heavens name do people keep TRACK of all THAT (without multiple cheat sheets, mind you) in ADDITION to keeping track of, like, "how" others at the table are betting, how one's poker face is being maintained, etc. etc.

GOD, just thinking about it in retrospect is enough to overwhelm me.

Anyway, whatever. As confusing as it was, it was actually really fun learning about the game. Surprisingly enough, I actually found the game to be strangely fascinating... even if I wasn't winning.

So there I was, just going along my merry way, studying these multiple phones' cheat sheets before making any and every move (and clearly, not pushing the bounds of my teammates' patience) when, out of the clear blue, would you look at that...


I won! I won! alkdsjflkdsjflkjLKJ! OMG, the HIGH you can GET from winning a poker hand is NO JOKE! To be perfectly honest, when I laid my cards out and people started saying I'd won, I totally lost track of even trying to understand WHY exactly I'd won. I mean, I swear things just started moving at such a frenetic pace and PLEASE. I was MUCH too distracted at the sight of... that little pile of poker chips heading my wayalkjfdslkdsjf! Not gonna lie... my palms actually got a little sweaty.

Best. Sweaty Palm. Experience. Ever.

Hahah. TMI? Anyway! And to think, that was just the start! I actually won a couple more hands... but nothing can compare to that first win. Sigh. Let's have a moment to reflect, if you will.

Believe it or not, I actually was totally as cool as a cucumber with my subsequent wins... or so I like to think. So maybe it wasn't necessarily me being as cool as a cucumber so much as it was... well, me STILL not fully and completely understanding the game just yet, let's be honest here. Well, what? How was I supposed to know that triple Queens was some kind of great hand to have?

In any event! All in all, I have to say... my first poker experience?

One. Big. Fat. Success.

Next up? Working on that poker face... ha. And I thought learning the game itself was going to be hard...

How Christie Got Her Glow Back...

okay. so i understand things have been a little busy in my life lately, and i know im an emotional person and i wear my emotions on my sleeve (one of my very few flaws, let's be honest... juuust kiddinggg. geez.) but i didnt think it was all that noticeable until you talked to me and i verbal vomited everything going on in my life to you within the first five minutes of conversation (remember? i talk quickly. faster than i type, if you can believe that). basically, i had fooled myself into thinking that im good at hiding my feelings despite already KNOWING that i wear my emotions on my sleeve. sigh. talk about one confused mess, that i am. haha.

anyway, thank goodness i was brought back to reality last week when one of my coworkers returned after a month-long vacation and ever so tactfully mentioned that id seemed to have lost, of all things, my glow.

my GLOW. my christie GLOW. my maliyacular GLOW. omg... my christiemas GLOW.

i know, i know. i had the same reaction. i mean, my glow is like one of my sole contributing components to the betterment of society. without the christie glow, what does christie really add to the world?? (i dont normally ever speak of myself in the third person. it's actually a pet peeve of mine. but whatever. remember that whole thing about how 'fickle' is my middle name? case in point, if you will.) so, needless to say, i kind of flipped out. and by "kind of" flipped out, i mean i only inquired about my glow status with a few other individuals (read: basically my workplace's 26th floor in its entirety as they paraded on by my desk)... and EACH individual i politely questioned (okay, kind of accosted/interrogated) couldn't even LIE about my glow status. it was all a very sad day in christieland.

it was from that point on that i have decided that i simply cannot be having this. i HAVE to get my glow back. i just have to. i mean, how else am i going to reach world domination (ruling by spirit fingers in lieu of the iron fist, and all that... oh you know what? i dont think ive written a blog entry about that topic just yet. oops. ah, for another time) if the essence of me is simply... well, slowly but surely... dimming?

ive put a lot of time and effort into brainstorming ways by which to restore my glow. after such introspective analysis (remember, my friends, the maliyacular is very deep)...ive come up with the following list:

1. LAUGH (or giggle)!! (this is easy- i laugh all the time. im very grateful for this trait- i mean, people are FUNNY. and by funny, i mean absolutely ridiculous.)

2. LISTEN TO CHRISTIEMAS MUSIC!!!! - seriously, i have been SO HAPPY the past few days at work just because i plug right on into my christiemas itunes playlist. seriously, it's A-MAZING how much of a happy place my christiemas music takes me to. and i only have three christiemas cds on my itunes!! (mariah carey... the original. love actuallyafksdljaskdlfjaosij!!!! glee!! and last year's starbucks christiemas cd). in fact, after this whole lack of glow business from last week, i made sure that my christiemas music was playing allllll weekend long (including as i slept... okay, so i woke up at like 4 AM because im a light sleeper and still get super excited each and every f'ing time i hear mariah carey's all i want for christiemas but whatever.)

2a. i know this goes without saying, but if you happen to feel this need to just get up and dance to your christiemas music, i really dont think anyone's going to judge you. if anything, i will solely judge you if you ARE listening to christiemas music and NOT dancing. um hello have you HEARD mariah carey's all i want for christiemas? as a very wise person (me) once said... HELLO.

3. eat, eat, eat! - you realize that the obvious disclaimer to this point is that, when eat, eat, eating, it's only in reference to sugary deliciousness. please note how this is not specific to chocolate, primarily because im not a chocolate kinda gal (i know, i know, blasphemy). sure, i love me the occasional peanut butter nutella cupcake or the occasional snickers/reeses/twix treat, but i am a firm believer that there is more to the land of sweets than chocolate. dont even GET me started on this dark chocolate revolution... but again, for another time.

4. gab, gab, gab! - always have your go-to people with which to take time out and, well, gab, gab, gab! therapeutic, really. it's amazing how easily you can laugh, laugh, laugh when you make it a priority to gab, gab, gab. and it ALL comes full CIRCLE (please reference #1 above!). i LOVE it when this happens!!!

okay. so the list isnt the most comprehensive thing ever (im sorry, but creating a restoring my glow checklist takes a lot of TIME here, people!). but it's covered the ESSENTIALS, right? i mean, you see what's in red above, right? duh.

so, my friends, milk and hot chocolate is the lesson for today (haha get it... it's like the whole idea of "lemons and lemonade" with a holiday twist... hahaha im actually quite proud of it). i mean, i could have completely freaked out with this whole lack of glow revelation... and sure, i did for a little... so maybe i dwelled on this for a couple of minutes (or days). but whatever. the POINT is that i have taken the liberty of re-prioritizing my mindset in order to restore my glow and, thus, maintain a healthier lifestyle (after all, well-rounded is my middle name... HA. hahahaha i just laughed ALOUD at the thought)...

and if i just HAPPEN to achieve world domination along the way well... what's a girl to do, right? im JUST SAYING...

bringing the world's holidays together, one funfetti cupcake at a time...

so i was debating whether christiemas festivities should begin this week or next week, but i think this week is quickly winning out. let's be honest here, i held out long enough as compared to in years past when you KNOW christiemas began in july. this was moreso a conscientious effort because i am just darn DETERMINED not to suffer from christiemas burnout before the grand december 25th itself. please. i've waited long enough. heck, starbucks has brought back their christiemas cups. it's TIME to start the season in full FORCE, thank you very much.

and dude. what a wonderful time to coincide one of the grandest seasons in the united states (christiemas. just to clarify) with one of the grandest holidays in the motherland (india. just to clarify)... diwali! woohooo! granted, i never celebrated this holiday growing up but it sounds so delightful and sunshiney and happy and merry... basically, it's totes spotlight material for the maliyacular... a blog devoted to flowers and springtime, sunshine and summertime, foliage and falltime, Mariah Carey and Christiemastime... but i digress.

okay. so it seems like everyone in india has been celebrating diwali the entire week (i may be slightly exaggerating. all i know is that they get the day off on friday. im just SAYING.) and MAN, do they celebrate in style. sigh. i want to go to india. haha i know PLENTY of you are reading this and being like... what. fair enough, i know i know. to which ill respond... well, WHAT?! i think it sounds so merry and joyous and just plain festive! just like christiemas if you will. i mean, think about it. there are all kinds of similarities. they're both religious holidays. they both involve the... festival of lights. they both involve happiness and spirit and sunshiney warm and fuzzies. well, you get the idea, right?

and the FESTIVITIES that take PLACE?!?! today was such an educational day at work. i learned about what the holiday actually celebrates but also HOW it gets celebrated over there. crafts and sweets? um hello, this is SO my kind of holiday. apparently, diwali also involves some sort of fireworks display (i mean, understandably, right? festival of lights... fireworks...at least, i think that's the connection. im still LEARNING, give me a break here!). anyway, putting all that information together (man, today was such an educational experience at work, let me tell you. im exhausted! haha), i decided it is about time WE celebrate some cultural roots and our counterparts half a world away by having our own little diwali celebration at work tomorrow.

i was super excited. i mean, arts and crafts? sweets? singing and dancing? general merriment? hooray hooray hooray!

well, so much for THAT idea. after my coworker voiced his concerns about my general sanity/craziness levels, i decided to just tone it down with... of course... baked goods. i mean, obvi. it's not like some coworkers and i gorged on chocolate last week in honor of halloween. but whatever. a mere side note, really. and how fab is THIS?? FUNFETTI cupcakes.... in honor of the FESTIVAL OF LIGHTS!!! GET IT??? funfetti is just about the most colorful kind of cupcake if ever there was one... i mean, with the frosting and sprinkles, it TOTES resemble fireworks, right?? right. well, whatever, we're going to go with that for now. and i think the decision to bake those funfetti cupcakes was simply fate. because as i was walking down my grocery store's baked goods aisle, what did i stumble across but... CHRISTIEMAS FROSTING!!!!!!!!!! eeee!!!!! it's like all the grandest things in the world just came together in one simple grocery aisle. lakfjojer!lkJlkjaals!

hoorayy!!! so get ready, world! let the christiemas festivities BEGIN!!!!! and what better way to begin the christiemas festivities than by saying... well, happy diwali!!

ps apologies for the lack of blog posts for the past MONTH. wtf, i know right? ill try to keep up. hell, i KNOW ill keep up. i gotta keep the world merry for the next two months at least! it's a tough job, but someone's gotta do it...

HUGS all around!

"A hug is a smile with arms, a laugh with a stronger grip." - Terri Guillemets

guess what this entry is allllll about? the wonders and delights of... the HUG!!! lakfjlaksjdf!!! I LOVE HUGS!!! giving them, receiving them... the best part about the hug is that there IS no difference. you give a hug, you get a hug! i mean, what better way to spread joy to the world, RIGHT?! (speaking of joy to the world... did you hear that miss mariah's coming out with a new christiemas album?! no worries, just a slight side note. there will be a future blog entry devoted to THAT in its entirety, rest assured.)

okay, so in my twenty-seven years on this glorious planet we call Mother Earth (i know, introspective, yo), i feel like ive seen enough to make some fair conclusions. one conclusion being that there is simply just not enough happiness in this world, gosh darn it. i know, i know, talk about stating about the most obvi of the obvious. BUT i also really think that most, if not all, the world's problems could really be solved if people would just start off and end any potentially tense encounters/meetings with a hug. think about it- who DOESN'T feel good after receiving a hug (well, let's just pretend creepy people don't exist in the world for a few moments)? RIGHT? i KNOW. if people started off every encounter with a genuine, hearty hug, you are pretty much guaranteed to formulate an innate bond with that other person, thus mitigating any tense feelings or potential sources of conflict that could arise in the remainder of your encounter/meeting. and THEN, even if said encounters go horribly awry, if you conclude your encounter/meeting with a grand hug, that innate bond is automatically re-formulated and all is merry again.

man, i really should win the nobel peace prize for this. but seriously, while i do realize i sound like im totally off my rocker with this idea, i REALLY think we're onto something here. i mean, honestly. just imagine if barack obama, mahmoud ahmadinejad and kim jong-il were in one room. i know, right? SCARY- barack, get OUTTA that ROOM! yes, that would be my first thought as well under normal (ie: present day) circumstances. however, imagine if obama, ahmadinejad and jong-il were in christieland, where hugs were mandatory, hugs were genuine, hugs were EVERYwhere! i mean, dont YOU think that these three would more quickly figure out that world peace is simply a mere hug away (and simultaneously figure out that nuclear weapons do NOTHING to help move forward the progress of society and should just be dumped in the ocean and left to rot? no? just me? sigh.)... now, i mean, im not delusional. it's not like i think ONE meeting with a hug will solve all the world's problems. but i DO think that it would increase the rate at which all of the world's problems are solved by, hmm, maybe tenfold. it's all very scientific, naturally.

this may be slightly confusing for some who know me well, as i am certainly NOT a touchy feely kind of person. i mean, im sorry, but personal SPACE, people! but i feel like hugs are in a realm of their own. they're just so powerful in nature. come on, think of the best hug you've ever gotten... omg arent they the BEST?!?! arms WIDE open upon introduction, the warm envelope of the embrace mid-hug, the side to side sway as the hug just continues on and on... lkajsdflkjasdklfjsdlka!!! ahhhhh come ON, if even just the THOUGHT doesnt make you want to squeal and dance in a merry little circle, i just dont know what DOES!!!!

i actually just spent a few minutes reflecting on what could possibly have been the best hug ive ever received. but i cant limit it to just one! there are simply too many different TYPES of hugs that ive gotten that it's simply not fair to limit it. there's those reunion hugs where you do the whole swaying back and forth or get picked up off the ground (okay, OBVIOUSLY it depends on with whom you are reuniting... i mean, never forget the art of common sense here, people), there's those heartwrenching goodbye hugs where one or both of you are crying and you can feel the wrenching sobs (while awful and sad, i still love the hug part itself), and there's those hugs you get from people who are so not huggers on a regular basis and totally catch you off-guard (delicious.). sigh. my heart is so full right now, merely thinking of specific instances of each of these types of hugs ive ever received.

so let's do it. let's start/spread this Hugapalooza. let's make it contagious (and limited to non-creepy individuals). let's make it grand. let's make the world merry again. go on! get out there! give someone (or several someones) a hug today. im serious!!

get ready, world! (and by world, i mean, readers o' the maliyacular, i guess...)

in gratitude of-

HUGS!!!!